Yes, it’s true. What’s more, I only wear them in winter. O.K., maybe autumn and spring as well. I just love warming my jeans up on our oil-filled radiator. Do NOT try this on any heater that glows. Actually, on ANY HEATER at all. They get so hot that I once ended up burning my tummy on the metal button. Hot pants on a cold morning. Pure bliss!
My other vices are quite boring. Chocolate. Preferably Swiss, dark, 85% cocoa hard-core addict chocolate. Of course, I share all my chocolate with the rest of the family, like a good, unselfish mother should. Like hell I do! I hide it where they’ll never find it – under the rice-cakes, in between the cookbooks or in my filing cabinet. Very occasionally, I’ll share with Richard. Oh, chocolate! Wow! he says, looking very, very surprised, as if it’s something that only appears in the house three or four times a year (as well he might).
Then there’s coffee – yes, I know, yawn. Coffee from the one place in town that has decaf that doesn’t taste like dishwater. I’ve got 827354 things to do in the city, but somehow I can always squeeze in an extra 15 minutes to go there and sit down with a coffee, a little biscuit and the papers. Yes, they even have delicious small biscuits instead of those giant horrible cookie things that are everywhere. Yum.
My final vice? Playing the same music in the car, over and over and VERY LOUD. I didn’t realise just how loud, until the neighbour, who was doing some gardening out the front, greeted my arrival with Hey, it’s the mobile disco! Little did she know that I’d already turned down the volume… My teenage daughter has been known to say “………” when the music comes on. WHAT DID YOU SAY? I reply. GOD, MUM, CAN YOU TURN DOWN THE VOLUME A BIT!!! I roll my eyes and reduce it by two points or so. Somehow it doesn’t quite seem right – shouldn’t that be the other way around, with her wanting the Smashing Pumpkins, Snow Patrol, Beck or some Love Metal band on full blast? What the heck. We all need a few secret vices. ‘Fess up, what are yours?